Faith And Hope

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Faith and hope, that’s what we really need right now. Last week I promise to tell you about Mr. M’s father. Before I write more, please take note that this is not some kind of ‘minta simpati’ entry. I just want to share how I feel right now, if I don’t let it out I’m afraid I will explode! And I prefer to express it on writing rather than speaking face to face with someone.

Last week, Mr. M’s father has been warded again. The last time is in April because his blood pressure is in alarming sign. The next morning he is paralyzed till now and his condition get worsen. He cannot speak, cannot move, his eyes are expressionless…the doctor said his lung and brain were infected. I was like OMG, now what?

Mr. M digests the news calmly but I know deep down it broke his heart. He didn’t tell or show his feeling to me but I guess when you love someone that much, you just know…

This week, the doctor advice the family to bring and look after Mr. M’s father at home because the doctor said there is not much he can do about his condition. What was that means to you? 
   

As far as I know, this situation demands a lot of sacrifice. Family members take turns to look after his father at the hospital. Do you have any idea how to work with panda eyes where your brain is numb and dizzy? While his father at the hospital, me and Mr. M went to see him every night. My mum said I don’t need to go there every night because there is nothing I can do. Besides, we will only make the space crowded. It’s true, there is nothing we can do but we can support each other by coming and let his father see familiar faces…

  

A lot of planned event also got canceled. I didn’t celebrate my birthday this year because Mr. M’s father is warded at that time. Mr. M insists but I can’t. Then last week, I gave my siblings two of my dinner ticket because Mr. M’s father warded again for the second time. And this week, I cannot attend the family gathering (the event is tomorrow) at Kg. Bundu Tuhan because in case something happen, I want to be there for Mr. M.

This situation makes me and Mr. M closer than ever. We’ve been through a lot of hard times and that hard times makes our relationship grow stronger. We also learn that consideration is very important…

Anyway, whatever the doctor said…we still have faith in God because He is the one and only who can decide your life and death. Remember as long you have faith, there is always hope...